I’m 23 lbs under weight,
Ribs protrude like cracks in the sand
I kinda look like the grill from an old rusty Chevy.
My teeth are constantly telling me with jolts of pain
to stop eating sweets, but its nothing
1600 mg of Motrin wont cure for the moment.
And my eyes grow more out of focus
with each passing moment that seems to blur on by,
like a bird that whizzes by, only it slams into the window
leaving its eyes stuck to the reflection
of the horizon on the pane,
it too cannot see a true horizon anymore.
And all that tar that chokes me on a daily basis
takes yet another breath of sweet life away,
so I place another between and ignite it with a passion
to fill me breathless once again.
My speculation of good health is blackened and over run
by the reality of my ill past, making for an unhealthy future.
But at least I’m not a cat,
and have to do this eight more times
after this one… EK
There are things in this world our eyes should not see with any amount of clarity.
There are things in this world that can eradicate everything that breathes.
Yet we try our best to see with great precision and understanding, humanities inevitable demise.
And when the slightest mistake frees the monsters far more frightening than our wildest imagination could dream
the sole survivor runs into his hole to hide, wondering who to blame as he dies.
"exit stage left"
Today I saw my new eye when I got up
Third eye sprung open but still I couldn't see
and this drove me crazy for a while
until I fell back into that precious little hole I like to call my mind
From there I tried to speak to you with my new tongue
it said nothing but words I can never explain
and when I tried to understand all these things I have done
I lost my will to live in silence again.
And this drove me crazy for a while
then my face hit that waiting floor
I like to call my pride.
You see, some days I'm violent
today I'm cruel
tomorrow maybe I’ll feel like shit and be invisible to you
If only you can see me laughing
with my skin painted red with hate
but its all for me, not you
When I woke up and tasted my first breath
with new lungs filled with death
I choked the day blue just for you my dear, just for you.
and collapsed into what I once was gasping like a dying Clown
and when I tried to love with my new heart
all the stitches came unglued
so I crawled back to you my dear
just to bleed me.
I tried on some new skin today
it felt like me but was a bit darker than I'm used to
so I asked a stranger for advice, I asked you
and right through me you walked, right by
I was invisible to you
and I'm lucky like that.
whats wrong with you today? why cant you see
that I'm having such a lucky day. EK